Friday, April 30, 2010

yuppie, an illustration

from urbandictionary...

Yuppie: I've got money and you don't.
Man: I've got a dick and you don't.

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

this is all that's left

i tell myself: if i wanna study java, this is the last of it that i have to do.

after tomorrow, that sumbitch thickass text isn't counting for shit anymore, though i think i will still reserve a place on my bookshelf for it, because with it comes programming nightmares. those fridays, those times i'd re-live for a laugh when i'll think back on the good old days when i was too curious for my own good and braved the computer nerd-infested waters of java, staggering out of the exam hall a beaten body covered in wounds, and on either side trembling hands afflicted with carpal tunnel syndrome.

but damn i'll be alive to tell the tale.

small brains

sometimes, i wonder what goes on inside the skull of my guinea pig. i wonder what logic systems she has, and what her brain's capacity for reasoning is. sometimes she sleeps on her side, curled like a kidney bean, her rodent palms pressed together. what weird little dreams does her tiny mind conjure?

Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Retarded Student: Oversimplified Object

public class RetardedStudent
//Retarded Student's variables
private int iq;
private int eq;
private int gpa;

//Retarded Student's methods
public void RetardedStudent (int iq1, int eq1, int gpa1)
{ iq=iq1; eq=eq1; gpa=gpa1; }

public double jobSearchPotential ()
{ jobSearchSuccess = 0.3 * iq + 0.55 * eq + 0.15 * gpa;
return jobSearchSuccess;

Thursday, April 22, 2010

Welcome to the Machine

Hundreds of students will pass out the back end of fifteen years of formal education within two weeks. Once cherubic, harmlessly mischievous and with souls so pure the deadliest threat they could summon was "I'll tell your mom", they now ride conveyor belts, like stale sushi, toward the yawning jaws of the machine.

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Sunday, April 11, 2010

Quotes from an Interview

"Well it's simple, if you just don't see yourself driving a Porsche in under 5 years, maybe you're not cut out for this job."

"Have you taken a look around our car park?"

"We're talking about 24 year olds who bring home $360,000 in bonus to their mothers. And you were expecting what, 1/10th of that for a yearly compensation? Give me a break."

"In a good year, salespeople made $6,000,000. We've had salespeople buy themselves a unit in Sentosa Cove, a DB-9, and go for a three week holiday, and still not know what to do with the cash."

"If you're wondering what I'm making now, well, it's safe to say it's not anything less than seven figures. Not including the cents digits, obviously."

"At the end of the day, it's whether you wanna be a BSD. You know, Liar's Poker? BSD? If you wanna be a hotshot, go for it.


If I needed a way to stick it to the guys who think they've got the biggest balls around, maybe I mighta just stumbled upon it.

Thursday, April 8, 2010

Goods & Services Tax

Overheard in school:

GST = Good Sex Techniques

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

what it is that i need to do

i can't graduate peacefully without leaving a legacy. i need to show people how shit gets done.

i need to muster the biggest F--K YOU double digits to the guys who think they've got the biggest balls around.

Thursday, April 1, 2010

Trade Suggestion


it has broken through a resistance level set in feb and tested in mar. looks like a bad ass move. EMA crossover just achieved.

buena suerte