Lunchtimes

are not for meeting friends. too short to have fun. and you spend so much time travelling just to meet up. meetup over a drink after work. better idea.

merry xmas,

but seeing how it could all fall apart

Trend Following

The one aspect of my life in which I have submitted to being part of the masses is trading. Trend-following is probably the simplest way there is to passively siphon off cash from some sucker's account into your own. Especially for dim and lazy people like myself.

I'm sold. My deepest drawdown this year was about 50%. I don't know how I managed to claw it way back up to ground zero, before going on to turn a profit, but it happened. Thanks to the euro mess part I in July. Then QE2. Then euro mess part II over these few days.

30-pip moves? Pffft. Get out of town. Let's go for serious 200, 300, 500 pip action.

Btw my bloomberg terminal has been shopping-carted. By next week I'll have 4 screens in front of me force-feeding data into my brain at any minute of a trading day in the office.

After-Party

One of the best things to do after a party is sit around with everyone else from the night before and piece together a complete play-by-play of the events. Puttingthe entire messed up story together from beginning to end with multiple perspectives is the most hilarious thing. Surely, it also helps to have a camera.

Life

Treat every moment as if it were your last.

In the past weekend, I nearly died in a traffic accident that would have been entirely my fault.

"They say I'm cocky...

... and I say what???
it ain't bragging motherfucker if you back it up!"
-Golden words of wisdom from Kid Rock.

On a side note, I'm evolving into an asshole. I'm not sure if I can pinpoint when it began to happen. In fact I probably can't even say I am currently evolving, because I already am one. What I'm doing is simply maturing into a deeper asshole. The phase I'm undergoing can sorta be compared to a puberty of assholes.

That makes me very happy. But also, time to halt this development.

Means to an End

How would you feel...
if you finally landed the job you wanted since way back in freshman year?

Been getting away with too much luck all my life.

Take Profit AUDUSD Crncy

AUD/USD pair has been on steroids in the past few weeks. It's now flirting with the all time high, at resistance set in July 2008, at a level above 0.99 to the dollar. Well think about it, this basically means parity to the USD. I think sell la. Enough profit already.

Pity the Fool...

... Who isn't long on something right now!

Welcome to the 4Q rally, fool!

Drawdowns

From a drawdown of 50% on my equity at the beginning of September, I managed to claw myself back up to square one by the end of the month. Phew! Longs on EUR/USD, AUD/USD and GBP/USD paid off. Shorted USD/CHF but this was stopped out with stop loss order (though while in the black, so no complaints).

One exciting month.

EUR/USD has busted 1.37. I dont know what to think anymore, but heuristic biases should be ignored; just follow the trend (though the gap from the MAs are widening like crazy).

The 2010 Bull Run

Don't you think the fence in the Ferrari picture looks like Bloomberg auto-regression bands?

Supercar Saturday

What money is spent on...

Office Badge of Honour

It is disturbing to me that gout has become somewhat a badge of honour among the upper echelons in the office. It's the disease to have, if you must be afflicted with something.

Because if you don't have gout, you haven't been eating and drinking finely enough.

@#$%@^^%#%$???!??!?!?!?!

I've been trading like a complete noob this past week!!!!!!!!!! I should be executed.

Pimps & ...

... World Head of Research & Equity Sales.

W.h.o.r.e.s, get it?

From a decade back...

My pals Shawn and Yunfei, who came to visit me in Hong Kong. Long way since messing around in an all-boys school, yeah!

Sigh, Singapore English

Bad grammar undermines credibility...

Hit it for all it's worth...

...Like it were a pinata.

Been bashing at the EUR/USD and GBP/USD for 2 weeks now, flogging every last pip out of it. Kept whacking away each time it retraced. Musta made something like 600 pips from the EUR/USD.

Now the EUR/USD and GBP/USD are ripe for a big pullback. I got my candies, I'm outta here. Turning to other risk currencies like AUD and NZD.

Smooth Operator

"Oh my god, your girlfriend looks like an actress!! Very stunning!!"

Convocate your Head

Contrary to popular misuse, the verb convocate has nothing to do with the noun convocation, that refers to a university graduation ceremony. So stop saying it like a verb, such as in the context of "woohoo I convocated yesterday now I feel like my IQ is 200", because it clearly isn't.

I'm going back to Singapore on Wednesday night!!!

All Summer Long

Went and got a new camera today. The old one has served me well, but it's showing weakness. Someone told me people celebrate a first paycheck with a self-congratulatory gift (like a bag or a suit or a watch). I guess this is how I embark on the long and swirling path of consumerism--acquisitions, trade-ups, upgrades--that comes with disposable income.

Next week I'm returning to Singapore to officially mark the end of my undergraduate days with a convocation ceremony. Back for a weekend that'll pass too quickly. However it'll be good to go back to school, for old times' sake. More photos (with my spanking new camera) with the gang.

And then...
I have about 5 weeks left in Hong Kong. Quick, huh?

I feel so on top of the news these days. Maybe it's just the job, maybe it's a line my boss said at the end of our last day in the orientation week back in the beginning of June.

"I expect all of you to know the latest news. If I ask you what's going on and you can't tell me, I will fuck you."

Hong Kong, Jul 2010

Right at home on the Avenue of Stars

World Cup Annoyance

Among the communities that root for Spain in this year's World Cup, there are a ton of fucking morons that express their support for the country as "Espanol!!!!!!"

Now that just doesn't fucking make any sense. You should be saying "Espana". Espanol is a language. It's like screaming "华语" when you support China in the fucking Olympics. That's just retarded.

Just stick to "Go, Spain" if you don't understand what you're saying.

Guess Who's Back

Internet's finally been set up. So many things have happened in the time I've been gone!

First things first:

1. Someone told me "six" doesn't rhyme with "dicks". That's just retarded. Rhyming has nothing to do with the ending alphabets being the same. Rhyming is about sound, you moron, and six does rhyme with dicks.
2. Spain is not going to win the World Cup final. The other PIGS of Europe have been booted out. I don't see why Spain should win, and allow themselves celebrations that would distract them from the more important task of fighting their way out of debt. And stop it with the siestas too.
3. I drink too much. I have more alcohol than blood plasma coursing through my arteries and veins. My piss is cloudy. I think I'm dying. Time to change my lifestyle.
4. Char my sweetheart and Bob my buddy came for a visit. It was great fun because sometimes, between having no internet and having nothing to do, I can get bored out of my skull. We visited so many places and shopped a lot.
5. Work's been fine. I enjoy my work. No complaints in this regard. They do like to stick the idea of money into our faces as a motivation. Notable quote: "The only thing we believe in is. Cold. Hard. CASH."
6. One of the reasons I got this job, was because my interviewer's assistant was in charge of screening CVs and shortlisting candidates for the interview. She went to Bocconi for a semester. So did I, two years after her. She made the connection when she sifted through the pile of resumes and saw Bocconi on my list of education institutions.

More to come. I've finally got Internet.

No Bullshit

Hi it's been a good long while since I updated. Now I'm one of those faceless boring working adults driving the economy while kids in school uniforms run around and scream and lower the GDP per capita just by their very existence.

Wait, wait--did I say boring working adults? No, tell me I didn't. The first week was one gauntlet of social events and drinks night after night, wherein a typical working day started with me crawling out of bed at 0600 hrs to get to the office by 0715 hrs, after which I'd have lessons and training sessions all day till 1800 hrs, before going out with bosses and colleagues alike into the town to paint it red, shooting whisky and chomping cigars, and showing em all how we roll. And we roll till about 1 in the morning, so we can all head back home to hit the sack by 0200 hrs, such that the possibility we may be up on our feet again 4 hours later is not negligible.

Now I'm in Hong Kong. I miss the friends I left behind and the old life, but considering the old life was essentially but a primer to reach a subsequent stage such as this, in which a bigger goal and purpose lay, then I guess yeah it'd do all of you some good to move on too, and recognise the reason why we had so much fun, was because we knew we'd never be presented with such an opportunity to ever again. We always told ourselves to make the last semester count, and sure we did. We got the pictures and the videos and the stories to prove it.

Hey Char I love you baby please come over soonest! I need to show you off. ;)

Winning Hand

Now, that, you sons of bitches, is what you call a full house. Read 'em and weep. I own you.

Haha Religion

I've been reading more comics lately since I've got plenty of time.

In the comic book The Losers (now a major motion picture), one character quips that on any US bank bill you can find "in God we trust". Except God, in the real world, stands for Guns, Oil, Drugs.

In a Marvel series, one character tells Wolverine or somebody that there's a new virus that only attacks people with faith. So anyone with a religion is diseased. He then goes on to explain his immunity, by saying he has a problem believing in things that are not above himself.

That's why they call em comics. Good laugh, yet so true too.

Bad Company

Eyes on the Prize

This isn't some 10 week internship or some modular course in university anymore. There's no end in sight. You don't get to do your countdowns and scratch days off a calendar. The old guys call it the rat race.

Except, I'm going to fuck all of you other rats.

Right, Lam?

oh the irony

Health minister Khaw is in hospital for heart disease.

But I guess, just as the education minister isn't the most scholarly, or the labour minister the most hardworking, it doesn't matter.

oh joy

people are going for grad trips and soon facebook will be flooded with photographic fuckups like blurry pictures, lame high-contrast manipulations, retarded jump poses, top down angled shots of not scenery but dumb faces...

i could list all my photography pet peeves but it's not gonna stop the irritating updates from coming. i should 'hide' all the potential fuckuppers first so i don't have to suffer the trash they make the rest of us see in a few weeks' time when they come back.

imma spank you around like yo mama used to do, punk

i'm going ballistic i can hardly contain myself it's time to flip out and kill the whole town imma be startin a bonfire tomorrow gonna pop champagne and spray the flames sky high and light my cigars with the fury of a thousand forest fires oooooooh yeah you can kiss this bachelor ass what up!!!

yuppie, an illustration

from urbandictionary...

Yuppie: I've got money and you don't.
Man: I've got a dick and you don't.

this is all that's left

i tell myself: if i wanna study java, this is the last of it that i have to do.

after tomorrow, that sumbitch thickass text isn't counting for shit anymore, though i think i will still reserve a place on my bookshelf for it, because with it comes programming nightmares. those fridays, those times i'd re-live for a laugh when i'll think back on the good old days when i was too curious for my own good and braved the computer nerd-infested waters of java, staggering out of the exam hall a beaten body covered in wounds, and on either side trembling hands afflicted with carpal tunnel syndrome.

but damn i'll be alive to tell the tale.

small brains

sometimes, i wonder what goes on inside the skull of my guinea pig. i wonder what logic systems she has, and what her brain's capacity for reasoning is. sometimes she sleeps on her side, curled like a kidney bean, her rodent palms pressed together. what weird little dreams does her tiny mind conjure?

Retarded Student: Oversimplified Object

public class RetardedStudent
{
//Retarded Student's variables
private int iq;
private int eq;
private int gpa;

//Retarded Student's methods
public void RetardedStudent (int iq1, int eq1, int gpa1)
{ iq=iq1; eq=eq1; gpa=gpa1; }

public double jobSearchPotential ()
{ jobSearchSuccess = 0.3 * iq + 0.55 * eq + 0.15 * gpa;
return jobSearchSuccess;
}
}

Welcome to the Machine

Hundreds of students will pass out the back end of fifteen years of formal education within two weeks. Once cherubic, harmlessly mischievous and with souls so pure the deadliest threat they could summon was "I'll tell your mom", they now ride conveyor belts, like stale sushi, toward the yawning jaws of the machine.

cos smoking ain't allowed in school

Salesman & Trader?

Quotes from an Interview

"Well it's simple, if you just don't see yourself driving a Porsche in under 5 years, maybe you're not cut out for this job."

"Have you taken a look around our car park?"

"We're talking about 24 year olds who bring home $360,000 in bonus to their mothers. And you were expecting what, 1/10th of that for a yearly compensation? Give me a break."

"In a good year, salespeople made $6,000,000. We've had salespeople buy themselves a unit in Sentosa Cove, a DB-9, and go for a three week holiday, and still not know what to do with the cash."

"If you're wondering what I'm making now, well, it's safe to say it's not anything less than seven figures. Not including the cents digits, obviously."

"At the end of the day, it's whether you wanna be a BSD. You know, Liar's Poker? BSD? If you wanna be a hotshot, go for it.

-----

If I needed a way to stick it to the guys who think they've got the biggest balls around, maybe I mighta just stumbled upon it.

Goods & Services Tax

Overheard in school:

GST = Good Sex Techniques

what it is that i need to do

i can't graduate peacefully without leaving a legacy. i need to show people how shit gets done.

i need to muster the biggest F--K YOU double digits to the guys who think they've got the biggest balls around.

Trade Suggestion

Long EUR/JPY

it has broken through a resistance level set in feb and tested in mar. looks like a bad ass move. EMA crossover just achieved.

buena suerte

Goalkeep-speak

Buffon of Juventus is gonna kick your ass....

Gigi Buffon and the Italian male psyche:

“I’ve been called gay, a facist; I’ve read how my relationship is in tatters, I’ve been called a loser, I can deal with all that. But mess with my family and

we’ve got a problem.”

@$$ K-k

I'm going to kick ass. I'm going to kick so much ass, it's not even funny. I'm going to kick asses like you've never seen asses get kicked. I'm going to kick asses so far they'd go one round around the planet and nearly hit me in the back of the head 3 seconds later, but they don't, because I'm such a professional I know just how much I have to hold back on my kick. When I kick ass I cleave galaxies in two. It's not everyday you see an ass kicking so epic that you fear for your own. I'm about to unleash so mega-brutally and I'm going to bring back the asses of a hundred thousand men left assless. You'll never look at an ass without feeling the twitch and the spasm in your leg ever again.

Motley Crue Friday Anthem...

Girls Girls Girls

Why I want a Bass?

Cos i wanna be bad ass.

B.ass.

critter twitter

hai, r we frens

The Blue Caterpillar

When I was a kid, one of the first instances of secondary smoking I witnessed happened in a scene from Alice in Wonderland (cartoon). The blue caterpillar took a drag from his hookah and blew smoke rings at Alice to ask who r u.

he was a cool guy.

now he's even cooler in the Tim Burton movie and he's been christened Absolem.

"Stupid girl."

Profit like the devil

"Woe to You Oh Earth and Sea,
for the Devil sends the beast with wrath
because he knows the time is short.
Let him who have understanding
reckon the number of the beast
for it is a human number.
Its number is six hundred and sixty six."

-Number of the Beast

Iron Maiden

School Shoes

I love being in school. It's fun hanging out with people you enjoy being around.

Now that I've quit Tommy Chevy's A-team at The Office, I'm gonna have more time to stay in school to study, practice Java, and savour the final moments of the schoolboy days.

p/s I don't like to wear socks, you can see that above. socks, ties and cufflinks are shackles that remind you of your place on the corporate ladder. i only wear all three articles for interviews. cufflinks are redundant. too many kids i see around in school wear these proudly. the ones with the bigger egos even have their names embroidered onto their sleeves. that... i guess is only useful if you go to the laundromat and don't want weirdos taking your shirt away without the security of being able to say 'check the name on that french cuff, hobo, now hand it back.'

No I don't wanna do extra work

There was a time when I used to be the tough ass eat-nails-for-breakfast insufferable slave driver of any team, but now, now that I'm over the hill with the nutty little school projects, I'm no longer the one taking it upon himself to refine to perfection every line of a report or every custom animation of a presentation. I just do my part and pull my weight and turn in a good piece of work to the poor guy who volunteered to compile the report, and I kick back and relax.

It's fun. No need to stay up overnight waiting for people who can't meet subdeadlines so I can begin work, and no need to spend hours trying to rephrase unintelligible sentences written in the letter of English, but structured with the grammar of Chinese and fraught with the logic of imbeciles.

Hard Rock

love this shot

Hey! Hey, Pound! Hey!

The pound is getting its ass shafted. Shorted GBP/USD and longed EUR/GBP, but they're taking breathers now.

Speaking of currency hedging analyses, I dunno how to incorporate a CHA into a portfolio reallocation analysis, for a portfolio with unhedged, partially-hedged and fully-hedged assets.

btw i love my gf

Son of a puke

Today as I got off the train to walk to my office, I had to navigate around a pool of puke someone had left on the platform. Booby trap for whoever slips on it and receives its full benefit. Work sucks that much, huh!

Recess week is nearly here. It's like cutting up that last piece of cake on the table into a ridiculously thin slice to act as if the cake can last longer than it's meant to.

Stuff to blow your brains out with

Now here's some advice:

National Hero

US dollar rally last night. Now really, that's what you mean by a Go USA! Would long USD against the JPY, but USD/JPY has been flat for months. Shorts on the GBP and EUR against the USD are paying off now. Reminds me of this joke:

There was a fat trader (usually they get fat, because big pay = good food, and also because cortisol, secreted during times of stress, encourages belly fat) who had a heavy lunch. He came back, and loosened his belt because his gut was enormous. In the trading pit, he saw that he now needed to buy back a position he had borrowed on. In the excitement and frantic gesticulating characteristic of traders, his pants fell to his ankles thanks to his unhooked belt. As everyone on the trading floor gaped at his boxers, the fat trader scrambled to pull his pants up. A wise guy goes "now that's what you call COVERING YOUR SHORTS!"

Yeah I bet you're scratching your head and wondering what's so funny. Get a brain! Morans...

Chinese New Year and Valentine's

Happy Valentine's. This Armani tee hugs your curves just right ;)

Pip my ride

When I checked my open positions and saw the USD dollar going through the roof I

JIZZED IN MY PANTS


OK but I have to take some advice from Nick and watch my defence because I'm fully loaded on six USD base/cross pairs and while my account is going north I can't afford to have it all rammed down my throat when the USD tanks.

USD/CHF

Breakout on the USD/CHF through resistances of Sep '09 and Dec '09.

It's like those silly whacking games where you have to use the mallet to bash the critter on its head the moment it emerges from the hole. This is exactly it. USD/CHF is that critter.

Dude this is a joke right?

Obama proposes to curb proprietary trading? Guess you motherfuckers aren't all rushing to go all Sales & Trading now anymore eh?

Which of course, makes Suckdick Capital Management even more IN YOUR FACE.

But nothing's certain; let's see how this goes and turns the financial world on its ear.

Movie

If I stick a camera in your face it's because I'm doing a video collage and well, I want you to be in it. So don't shy away, give me a thumbs up give me a smile give me an up yours flip me the bird--anything. However you wanna remember yourself in college.

The Silence of Your Lambs

Man these guys look like goofballs who just grow their hair long because it makes them look all metal and shit, and their band name is really such a wimpy one but dude when they do their show they blow your nuts right out of your ears.

Coming in April 2010. Lamb of God @ Downtown East.

Wall of Death, biatch!!!!!

12th Day of Christmas

Boy, your soul betta' belong to Jesus...

...Cos your ass belongs to Chevrier !



Have a good stay Kenny

Let's Rock

You bring the ass, the turtles bring the whoopin'

First working day of 2010 coming up. USD pushed upward at the end of last year. I'm unsure what's going to happen when the markets open after all the revelry, but I'm excited.

31st Dec 2015: Conclusion of The Great Turtle Experiment.

What comes next, is a fund that's gonna be called Suckdick Capital Management LLP. Chew on that.

BUTTERZOMBIES, & Happy New Year

Only in the VIP. Buon Anno Nuovo!

Thanks to Char and her colleagues and friends, it was a pretty fun night. Easy as butter, smooth as a baby's behind!

It's 2010. Try to make this year count, if you haven't been doing much with your life in the past. The future is now.